Just like any kid, I grew up dreaming of becoming something. I wanted to become a doctor to help people who are sick. That dream made me motivated to study harder, do good in school and avoid any type of distraction.
Many think of me as a geek in school. I wore very thick eyeglasses, i had a very big backpack full of books. i always bring everything. I was somewhat neat but always end up going home in a mess.
I loved going to school most of the time. I study at home before playing. I always make sure my school stuff is ready before sleeping. I make sure that I have an answer to what our teacher asks us and I recite so that my teacher notices me.
In my early years in school, I'm just an average student. I only have a few star moments like joining quiz bees, joining the dance troup and becoming a club member. I never experienced going up the stage to receive a medal or an award.
Everything changed when I got to 6th grade until I graduated high school. I was surprsed of what I become. I was at the top of the class, i found some of the subjects I took in class very easy to understand. I good excellent grades with or without effort.
I just thought of it when I was writing this that it got into my head too much that I was becoming inteligent, bright and becoming very good with things. I thought I can do everything. It saddens me because I think that I gave myself too much pressure to good with everything that I do and when I'm about to fail in something, i quickly avoid it. I ended up not facing challenges. Scared to fail.
Then I watched TV this morning, was just browsing the channels. Then I saw someone speaking, he was preaching. You know about Sunday morning TV here in the Philippines. There's nothing to watch but mass and a pastor preaching. I listened and thought about what he's talking about.
He was talking about having faith. Being faithful to God, to your family, to your employer and to everyone. Then I thought, was that the only thing that I was lacking? If I could remember, I had faith. I was faithful! Why did I lose it? When did I lose it?
i stopped asking those questions. I should do something. NOW! I'm going to start all over. It's not going to be easy but I'll do it one step at a time. SInce I'm currently employed, which is by the way already a blessing, be faithful to my job. Eventually, things will fall into place like before.
I can eventually go back to school without any interference or interruptions. I had to stop when I came back because of mommy. I'm glad i did because I was able to spend my time with her.
i think nows the time to begin. Start a new journey. I can always relax and have fun. There's always going to be a time for it but now I only have to concentrate on one thing. My job.
Soon I'll be able to attain that dream. I just needed faith. i never thought that a five letter word, that used to be a name of a section when I was in prep is the answer.
