Where to stay?

He's leaving in a month's time. He's going to stay in Florida for 3 years. I'll be in a long distance relationship and I don't know if we'll be able to work it out that way. Where will I stay while he's gone?

We've talked about it, when I told him that I wanted to stay with my mom in Las Pinas, he got sad. When his friends asked him where will I stay he old them it's up to me. I'm confused! I already asked somebody what's their take on this, they told me to stay in Las Pinas to avoid troub;e with his family. I'm just looking at the worst case scenario.

Totally, I'm a stranger to this house. They don't know where exactly my house is. They only know me as Vince, his friend who doesn't have a place to stay whenever he has work, To some, his boyfriend of almost 4 years.

I stayed here because of him. I wanted to be close to him everyday. I wanted to know what it feels like to have a man in my life in which I haven't experienced growing up. I wanted someone to guide me and to support me in everything I do. You know what, thats what I get here in this house.

Now that he's leaving, I'm alone again. Will i be able to go and live my life without him around. Knowing that there's YM, but is it enough? WIll I be able to get the same things through that?

I don't know why we can't talk about these things seriously. I sometimes think that I'm not a part of his decisions. Like what happened last night, he told his friends that he's going to Lucena tomorrow. not that i don't want him to go, but at least tell me that he's going.

There are time that his friends tell me that I should know this or some things that's been happening by now. I just tell them maybe he'll tell me about teh whole thing later, in which he didn't.

I wanted to confront him, or just tell him what I feel about this. But I'm afraid that he'll take it in another way. Or he might misunderstand what I'm trying to say.

I wanted to tell him that I'll be ab;e to tell him where I'll be staying once I find a new job. That I'm going to make things right for my life. That I'm tired of how things are and I wanted to change it. I wanted him to know what I feel and why these things are happening.

I realized that where to stay is not just the problem. It's us. There something wrong with everything and I'm not sure if he notices it, or i'm the one who's taking everything for granted.